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Hold my calls, 2,123 new Minnesota flags just dropped.
In a move guaranteed to derail workplace productivity for the rest of the week, the State Emblems Redesign Commission revealed the thousands of answers Minnesotans submitted to the question: How hard can it be to design a new state flag?
The submissions were full of earnest efforts to give Minnesota the state symbol it deserves. Elegant flags. Designs crafted with an eye for the state's history and its future.
The kind of flags that say "Minnesota" without needing to have the word "Minnesota" written across them in big red letters like the one we have now.
This is not a story about those flags.
This is a salute to the other flags. The flags scrawled in crayon. The flags with dogs and mosquitoes and loons with laser eyes. The flags that exist just to make you laugh.
Here's to the flags that may not tell you much about Minnesota, but tell you everything you need to know about the people who love this place.
Who's a good flag? You're a good flag! Minnesotans designed their flags with the things they love best about this place. The loons, the stars, the northern lights. Canoes, hotdish and hockey sticks. And one flag that was just a photo of this very good dog.
Here's to the BAYG FLAYG. When I say "bayg" you say "Minnesota!"
I have scrolled through upwards of 2,000 flag designs and I am here to report that there are at least three that feature loons shooting lasers out of their eyes. Which makes me wish there were more. Pew! Pew! Pew!
Less a flag than a bumper sticker, but "Cold like Minnesota" is living rent-free in my head right now.
Say what you will about a flag that features our state bird, the mosquito. But if you ran it up the flagpole, people would be unlikely to squint at it and say "Which state flag is that? Utah?" like they do now.
Here's to the flag that was just the Canadian flag, but blue. Here's to the flag that was a photo collage of presidents' heads with a hockey stick thrown in the mix. Here's to the multiple flags educating the world about ducks, ducks and gray ducks.
Here's to whatever's going on here.
Thanks to the thousands of Minnesotans who took the time to design a new flag, to brighten the state or just brighten our day.
