Patrice Johnson hosted her first virtual happy hour last week. Now she has a calendar to keep track of her virtual social life: Monday nights are for work buddies; Wednesdays happy hour; Thursdays high school friends; Fridays, there's a coffee klatch; Sundays are for virtual brunch with her daughter.
"I don't know how long we will keep up this schedule," said Johnson, who lives with her husband in Roseville. "As an extrovert, I gravitate toward anything social that reminds me of how much I love the people I am lucky enough to call my friends."
The coronavirus pandemic has brought social life to a halt, wiping brunches, book clubs and birthday parties from calendars. But we're finding ways to connect, hosting everything from simple one-on-one FaceTime chats to improv comedy sessions using PowerPoint prompts and virtual beer pong tournaments.
Virtual events give us something to look forward to, a reason to put on a clean shirt and a time to realize how many friends and family members are feeling the very same way.
"We need connection now more than ever," said Johnson. "It's kind of interesting that our technology takes the blame for taking our attention away from actual conversations, and now we have found a way for it to reconnect us."
Best apps, practices
Johnson uses Zoom and Google Hangouts to connect, while others use Skype or FaceTime. The Houseparty app is becoming a popular way to play group games.
No matter the platform, most people find that selecting a grid view is best in a social situation, because it lets you see more faces at once.
All the different expressions and reactions (and the greater chance that a pet will wander into a square or two) make it feel more like hanging out in real life than settings that only show the person speaking.
Johnson recommends finding a comfy, well-lit spot to set up your device. Oh, and make sure you have space for snacks, a beverage and maybe a box of tissues, too.
"Once you connect, allow yourself to feel whatever comes over you," advised Johnson. "There will be tears, lots of tears, but there will be even more laughter and love. Also, please check in with people who are introverted and isolated."
Zoom allows you to change the background so that it looks like you are calling from space, or even from your favorite bar, if you upload your own photo. (The app also has a "touch-up my appearance" feature to give your face a softer focus.)
Another tip: Make sure to spend a lot of time listening. It's impossible for everyone to all talk at once. That why most platforms have chat features that let you type to interject a thought or comment without interrupting.
And of course, if your spouse is noisily loading the dishwasher, hit that mute button so the party isn't drowned out by the background clatter.
For three or 300
Living alone, Natalie Wires is finding that virtual-get togethers are a "lifeline."
The Minnetonka marketing director has been connecting with a few friends for regular game nights, using the Houseparty app to play the charade game Heads Up and doodle game Quick, Draw.
"It was incredibly comforting to just hang out, laugh and focus on something other than coronavirus for a while," she said.
While many first-time virtual event planners are keeping things small and casual, folks at the media arts organization Pollen hosted a Zoom gathering for 300 people last Thursday. They now have one planned every week, through April 9.
The group, which works to build empathy through storytelling, decided to create a series of virtual events called "Are You OK?" with speakers, musical performances and lots of connection. The first one was fully booked through free tickets on Eventbrite, .
"You could see people crying. I don't think we all knew how much we needed it," said Jamie Millard, the group's executive director. "It was also a reminder of normalcy and some way to be with people."
Millard said she's seen lots of innovative ways to connect.
"I am really buoyed by the resilience of people pivoting quickly and being willing to try something new and different," she said. "There's positivity, there's ingenuity, there's connection that's happening."
Johnson, who teaches cooking classes at the American Swedish Institute, has been creating different menus and drink pairings for her virtual events and sharing photos on Instagram.
"There are ways to remind ourselves to celebrate whenever we have the opportunity," she said. "Yes, things are really dire, but don't allow current events to dim whatever light you have."
Erica Pearson • 612-673-4726
