Dear Amy: I’m having a problem getting a friend to live up to her agreement to split expenses on a recent trip.
She was traveling to my town in central Florida (not staying with me). But, since my brother recently moved to NYC, she wanted to fly into NYC (so she could stay cheaply) and wanted me to come north from Florida so we could spend a week and go sightseeing, and then fly to Florida together.
I agreed to go to New York with the understanding that we’d split costs.
When we got back to Florida and I asked her to pay half the fee for the airport parking, my friend asked why she should have to “pay for my parking.” This isn’t a cheap fee. It was $100, though cheaper than alternative airport shuttles/limos. Am I correct in asking for the payment since I otherwise would not have gone on this trip and, thus, not incurred the parking fee?
Amy says: I’m a bit on the fence, but I don’t think you are owed a parking fee for your own car for a trip you chose to take. Granted, if your car hadn’t been at the airport, you both would have incurred a transportation fee to get to your final destinations, but you craftily imply that this airport ride was (almost) the sole purpose of you going on this weeklong vacation. (And yes, it was very nice of you.)
Ideally, your friend would have offered to compensate you for the one-way airport transportation you provided (it can be quite expensive), but I don’t believe she actually owes this to you.
Her expense in getting to and from her home airport and your expense in getting to and from your home airport are your own expenses to bear.
Out with the old
Dear Amy: My fiancé and I both have demanding jobs with long hours. To help around the house, we hired a lovely woman to assist with cleaning, laundry, etc. About a year ago she gave us a comforter set with matching throw pillows for our bed. It was a kind, generous gift, especially considering that she has a family to care for and is not of great means.
We’ve been using the comforter for about a year. The issue is that I don’t particularly like the pattern, and I have a beautiful down duvet that I would prefer to use. We also received a lovely duvet cover at my bridal shower.
Because she changes our sheets, I need to tell her that I would prefer to use my new bedding. How can I do this tactfully?
Amy says: You have been using this set for a year, and now that you are getting married and receiving gifts, it is time to add more selections to your bedding rotation.
Tell your cleaner, “We received another bedding set for a wedding gift, so we’re going to start using it. I’m going to pack your gift to use for guests and other special occasions. Thank you again for your generosity.”
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