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Every franchise is good at something. No, really.
The Minnesota Wild is good at making excuses. Lose a first-round playoff series in five games to an inferior opponent? Blame the bouncing puck. Why does vulcanized rubber hate the Wild?
The Minnesota Timberwolves are good at not winning. They've been around since 1989 and have won playoff series in exactly one season.
The Minnesota Twins are good at nostalgia. Did you know this is the 13th anniversary of almost beating the Yankees in 2004? Enjoy your autographed Nick Punto slip-and-slide.
The Minnesota Vikings? Other than crushing souls, the Vikings are actually good at something pretty valuable. They are the local champions of sports drama.
Winning a Super Bowl might be interesting for a moment, but was the sports world made more compelling when the Ravens or Buccaneers won one? No.
Losing every Super Bowl in which you've played, as well as the past five NFC Championship Games in which you've played? That's dramatic.
Signing Brett Favre and having him beat the Packers twice and yet still lose in the Superdome? Dramatic.
Bringing in Jim McMahon, Warren Moon and Randall Cunningham? Drafting Randy Moss, Percy Harvin and Onterrio Smith? Having a coach question whether the franchise quarterback was rehabilitating himself near a Chinese restaurant?
Trading for Sam Bradford days after Teddy Bridgewater suffered one of the most inexplicable injuries in football history? Enduring the Love Boat, the Original Whizzinator, a coach scalping Super Bowl tickets, a coach who sued his own owners, videos shot in bunkers, the Calcutta Clipper, Jerry Burns defending Bob Schnelker, the Gang of 10, Pecos River …
Adrian Peterson became a leading actor in the Vikings' most recent dramas. He made himself one of the best running backs to ever carry stitched leather. He beat his son severely, then defended his actions. He rushed for 2,000 yards after rehabilitating a severe knee injury. And he looked strangely tentative in the last game in which he played as a Viking, which preceded two games in which he did not play.
Tuesday, Peterson signed with the New Orleans Saints. A franchise in need of defensive help, with a pass-first offense, would seem to be a strange fit for Peterson, until you consider this:
The Saints will open the 2017 season at U.S. Bank Stadium against the Vikings. So of course Peterson signed with New Orleans, just as it was destined that Herschel Walker would play his first game as a Viking against the Packers in the Metrodome.
It wouldn't be surprising to see the Saints sign Blair Walsh right before the game, just for laughs.
As Vikings history proves, "dramatic" is not synonymous with "successful," and Peterson might be acting as a carrier of this purple strain.
The Saints' signing of Peterson smells of mutual desperation.
Saints coach Sean Payton hasn't won more than seven games since 2013. He has publicly feuded with key players, including running back Mark Ingram, who is coming off a 1,000-yard season in which he averaged 5.1 yards per carry.
The early indications are that Peterson will complement Ingram, but will Peterson be happy with such a role?
Peterson isn't adept at pass-blocking or receiving and will be joining an intricate passing offense. National reporters are citing front-office sources saying that Peterson could be revitalized by Payton, but all of those front offices weren't willing to spend $4 million on him.
Peterson looked old and slow last season, and his strength the previous season was wearing defenses down with dozens of carries.
Will he look younger at 32 than at 31? Will he get enough carries in New Orleans to wear down defenses?
Peterson returning to Minnesota in September is the kind of drama we've come to expect from the Vikings. History suggests he will catch 10 passes and score three touchdowns that night, then high-five David Ortiz, Kevin Garnett, A.J. Pierzynski and Mike Yeo in the end zone.
Jim Souhan's podcast can be heard at MalePatternPodcasts.com. On Twitter: @SouhanStrib. • jsouhan@startribune.com